do i have cramps or has my appendix exploded
does my boob hurt or am i having a heart attack
am i on my period or do i have internal bleeding
these are our struggles
Thinking of dirty thoughts and getting an erection in awkward situations
The struggles of a man
thinking of my naked grandma isnt going to suck the blood back into my vagina
you need an award right now
before you date a girl with a mental illness, remember: saying, “you’re beautiful” won’t balance the chemicals in her brain.
and don’t fucking say, “i’ll be here for you, no matter what,” if you don’t mean it.
don’t think you’re fixing her by saying, “i love you.” because you’re not
listening to a sad song that has a nice beat
i fucking love whenever people are like “how would steve rogers react to the fact that people now curse and talk about sex?”
he grew up as a poor orphan in Brooklyn and joined the fucking army i think he’s got that shit covered
Please reblog if you know anyone who might take party drugs.
do action movies know they can have more than one female character
Someone should make an action movie with all girls except for one guy and have no explanation or mention of it in the movie and then pay all of the actors to act surprised like they’d never noticed when they get the inevitable storm of questions.
This one male must have a shower scene, be saved by the protagonist at least once, and fall in love with a lead female.
Disneyworld needs to make a rollercoaster based off of the ride Yzma and Kronk take to the lair. When the ride starts, Yzma’s voice yells “pull the lever, Kronk!” and the ride starts to move backwards so she yells “wrong lever!” and it shoots you forward.
how fuckin terrified do u think harry would be if his scar started hurting again tho like omg
harry potter age 35 gets a sinus infection that causes shooting pains into his forehead he is next seen screaming and running naked in the streets of london firing expelliarmuses into the air
so i was looking up stuff about birth control throughout history and
so I was shopping for underwear online and this appears
??? ??!? ?
the longer I look at it the funnier it gets
now your dick can be the pirate it always wanted to be
The fearless butt pirates we have all heard about.
the newest member of the avengers initiative: Dick Fury